Cecilia now for about a fortnight passed her time without incident;
the Harrels continued their accustomed dissipation, Sir Robert
Floyer, without even seeking a private conference, persevered in his
attentions, and Mr Arnott, though still silent and humble, seemed
only to live by the pleasure of beholding her. She spent two whole
days with Mrs Delvile, both of which served to confirm her
admiration of that lady and of her son; and she joined the parties
of the Harrels, or stayed quietly at home, according to her spirits
and inclinations: while she was visited by Mr Monckton often enough
to satisfy him with her proceedings, yet too seldom to betray either
to herself or to the world any suspicion of his designs.
Her L200 pounds however, which was to have been returned at the end
if the first week, though a fortnight was now elapsed, had not even
been mentioned; she began to grow very impatient, but not knowing
what course to pursue, and wanting courage to remind Mr Harrel of
his promise, she still waited the performance of it without
speaking.
At this time, preparations were making in the family for removing to
Violet-bank to spend the Easter holidays: but Cecilia, who was too
much grieved at such perpetual encrease of unnecessary expences to
have any enjoyment in new prospects of entertainment, had at present
some business of her own which gave her full employment.
The poor carpenter, whose family she had taken under her protection,
was just dead, and, as soon as the last duties had been paid him,
she sent for his widow, and after trying to console her for the loss
she had suffered, assured her she was immediately ready to fulfil
the engagement into which she had entered, of assisting her to
undertake some better method of procuring a livelihood; and
therefore desired to know in what manner she could serve her, and
what she thought herself able to do.
The good woman, pouring forth thanks and praises innumerable,
answered that she had a Cousin, who had offered, for a certain
premium, to take her into partnership in a small haberdasher’s shop.
“But then, madam,” continued she, “it’s quite morally impossible I
should raise such a sum, or else, to be sure, such a shop as that,
now I am grown so poorly, would be quite a heaven upon earth to me:
for my strength, madam, is almost all gone away, and when I do any
hard work, it’s quite a piteous sight to see me, for I am all in a
tremble after it, just as if I had an ague, and yet all the time my
hands, madam, will be burning like a coal!”
“You have indeed been overworked,” said Cecilia, “and it is high
time your feeble frame should have some rest. What is the sum your
cousin demands?”
“O madam, more than I should be able to get together in all my life!
for earn what I will, it goes as fast as it conies, because there’s
many mouths, and small pay, and two of the little ones that can’t
help at all;—and there’s no Billy, madam, to work for us now!”
“But tell me, what is the sum?”
“Sixty pound, madam.”
“You shall have it!” cried the generous Cecilia, “if the situation
will make you happy, I will give it you myself.”
The poor woman wept her thanks, and was long before she could
sufficiently compose herself to answer the further questions of
Cecilia, who next enquired what could be done with the children? Mrs
Hill, however, hitherto hopeless of such a provision for herself,
had for them formed no plan. She told her, therefore, to go to her
cousin, and consult upon this subject, as well as to make
preparations for her own removal.
The arrangement of this business now became her favourite
occupation. She went herself to the shop, which was a very small one
in Fetter-lane, and spoke with Mrs Roberts, the cousin; who agreed
to take the eldest girl, now sixteen years of age, by way of helper;
but said she had room for no other: however, upon Cecilia’s offering
to raise the premium, she consented that the two little children
should also live in the house, where they might be under the care of
their mother and sister.
There were still two others to be disposed of; but as no immediate
method of providing for them occurred to Cecilia, she determined,
for the present, to place them in some cheap school, where they
might be taught plain work, which could not but prove a useful
qualification for whatever sort of business they might hereafter
attempt.
Her plan was to bestow upon Mrs Hill and her children L100 by way of
putting them all into a decent way of living; and, then, from time
to time, to make them such small presents as their future exigencies
or changes of situation might require.
Now, therefore, payment from Mr Harrel became immediately necessary,
for she had only L50 of the L600 she had taken up in her own
possession, and her customary allowance was already so appropriated
that she could make from it no considerable deduction.
There is something in the sight of laborious indigence so affecting
and so respectable, that it renders dissipation peculiarly
contemptible, and doubles the odium of extravagance: every time
Cecilia saw this poor family, her aversion to the conduct and the
principles of Mr Harrel encreased, while her delicacy of shocking or
shaming him diminished, and she soon acquired for them what she had
failed to acquire for herself, the spirit and resolution to claim
her debt.
One morning, therefore, as he was quitting the breakfast room, she
hastily arose, and following, begged to have a moment’s discourse
with him. They went together to the library, and after some
apologies, and much hesitation, she told him she fancied he had
forgotten the L200 which she had lent him.
“The L200,” cried he; “O, ay, true!—I protest it had escaped me.
Well, but you don’t want it immediately?”
“Indeed I do, if you can conveniently spare it.”
“O yes, certainly!—without the least doubt!—Though now I think of
it—it’s extremely unlucky, but really just at this time—why did
not you put me in mind of it before?”
“I hoped you would have remembered it yourself.”
“I could have paid you two days ago extremely well—however, you
shall certainly have it very soon, that you may depend upon, and a
day or two can make no great difference to you.”
He then wished her good morning, and left her.
Cecilia, very much provoked, regretted that she had ever lent it at
all, and determined for the future strictly to follow the advice of
Mr. Monckton in trusting him no more.
Two or three days passed on, but still no notice was taken either of
the payment or of the debt. She then resolved to renew her
application, and be more serious and more urgent with him; but she
found, to her utter surprise, this was not in her power, and that
though she lived under the same roof with him, she had no
opportunity to enforce her claim. Mr. Harrel, whenever she desired
to speak with him, protested he was so much hurried he had not a
moment to spare: and even when, tired of his excuses, she pursued
him out of the room, he only quickened his speed, smiling, however,
and bowing, and calling out “I am vastly sorry, but I am so late now
I cannot stop an instant; however, as soon as I come back, I shall
be wholly at your command.”
When he came back, however, Sir Robert Floyer, or some other
gentleman, was sure to be with him, and the difficulties of
obtaining an audience were sure to be encreased. And by this method,
which he constantly practised, of avoiding any private conversation,
he frustrated all her schemes of remonstrating upon his delay, since
her resentment, however great, could never urge her to the
indelicacy of dunning him in presence of a third person.
She was now much perplext herself how to put into execution her
plans for the Hills: she knew it would be as vain to apply for money
to Mr. Briggs, as for payment to Mr. Harrel. Her word, however, had
been given, and her word she held sacred: she resolved, therefore,
for the present, to bestow upon them the 50 pounds she still retained,
and, if the rest should be necessary before she became of age, to
spare it, however inconveniently, from her private allowance, which,
by the will of her uncle, was 500 pounds a year, 250 pounds of which
Mr Harrel received for her board and accommodations.
Having settled this matter in her own mind, she went to the lodging
of Mrs Hill, in order to conclude the affair. She found her and all
her children, except the youngest, hard at work, and their honest
industry so much strengthened her compassion, that her wishes for
serving them grew every instant more liberal.
Mrs Hill readily undertook to make her cousin accept half the
premium for the present, which would suffice to fix her, with three
of her children, in the shop: Cecilia then went with her to Fetter-lane, and there, drawing up herself an agreement for their entering
into partnership, she made each of them sign it and take a copy, and
kept a third in her own possession: after which, she gave a
promissory note to Mrs Roberts for the rest of the money.
She presented Mrs Hill, also, with 10 pounds to clothe them all
decently, and enable her to send two of the children to school;
and assured her that she would herself pay for their board and
instruction, till she should be established in her business, and
have power to save money for that purpose.
She then put herself into a chair to return home, followed by the
prayers and blessings of the whole family.
Nguồn: Wikisource English — Cecilia (Burney)/Book 3/Chapter iv. Văn bản được nhập và định dạng lại; CC BY-SA 4.0, có thể áp dụng điều khoản bổ sung của tác phẩm.